Sometimes the best way to deal with loneliness is to discover the closest friend God has given you: you.

1. Befriending yourself is not a spectator sport. Lose the lawn chair and grab your hiking boots. Think work - you're going to have to sweat to get to know this Self of yours.

2. Find time to be alone. Get a job where you can daydream, or walk home the long way, or turn down dates and outings to mindless places doing routine things. It takes oodles of one-on-one, distraction-free me-time to get reacquainted with this Self the Father created you to be.

3. Buy a journal. Yeah, yeah, I know you've kept journals in school and wrote in a diary during one month in sixth grade. This is different. This has no rules, no guilt, no real purpose. Just play on paper with your own crazy, unique Self. Think of it as minutes for the New You Fan Club - note excursions of the mind and heart for easy future reference and to get you used to paying close attention. Friends don't let friends be ignored.

4. Carry your journal or a book with you at all times. Weirdly enough people don't interrupt a "lonely" person if they're reading or writing. They seem so "productive," I guess. Daydreamers, on the other hand, are attacked by passers-by constantly. You'll get roped into conversations or asked to lift heavy objects simply because you weren't "doing anything." Go ahead and tell the next person who asks, "I'm debating with myself," or "Myself and I are creating the next academy-award winning script," if you think it'll work, but bring the book or journal along just in case.

5. Always keep a sense of humor and stay humble. Self is a God-created, flawed being just like you, and a liar and a cheat besides, so don't expect a friendship-made-in-heaven. Still … he/she is the best you've got, and no one else is going to ever be as honest or understand you half so well (except, of course, God).

6. Pray a lot. Since God stuck you two together in the first place, it makes sense he expects you to duke it out, to wrestle each other into compromises, and to be content with each other's strengths and weaknesses. Thank him, listen to his Word, and get alone long enough each day to allow him to work on that great big heart all three of you are sharing.

7. Turn off your CD-players and TVs for at least one hour a day. Get comfortable with silence. Scary, isn't it? But white noise covers up a lot of pain and prevents a lot of thinking. Stop. Sense what's around you. What's inside. It's all you've got to work with. But it's enough. And with Christ reigning in your spirit, it's more than enough to make a dynamite team.

Warning: When you're all alone and quiet, you and Self may face some pretty ugly stuff. Remember, Jesus died for that ugliness! He knows you better than you can ever imagine and is waiting to introduce you to the real, sanctified Self he paid for with his life. He can even work miracles in your disposition and your everyday life and grant all you need to be content and joyful. In fact, washed in his blood you're beautiful.

Look at you - what a friend you are in Jesus!

Ramona Czer teaches at Bethany Lutheran College in Mankato, Minnesota.